Gay:
one who is attracted primarily to the same sex (homosexual); Lesbian- a woman who is primarily attracted to other women; Bisexual- one who feels sexual attraction for both genders; Transvestite- one who dresses as the opposite sex for sexual fulfillment; Transsexual- one who identifies emotionally as the opposite sex; Questioning- one who is unsure of his or her sexual orientation or gender identity. Homosexulaity is NOT a mental illness.
Come out? But I'm frum!
Coming out refers to the process of first understanding your sexuality, coming to terms with it, telling friends and family. Go only as far as you feel comfortable. Don't rush into something you're not comfortable doing. Also, be prepared for negative consequences. The reaction that you get when coming out to a loved one may not be the one you expected.
Being gay does not mean that you have to have sex, or that you even have to "come out". Being gay is a self-identification. If sex is not for you, or you're not sure that you're ready, never feel pressured into doing something you're not comfortable with. It sounds cliché, but it's serious. If you decide to have sex, be sure to practice safe sex, all the time. Learn the skills that it takes to say no. Understand that when under the influence of chemical substances (alcohol, drugs, etc.) you compromise these skills and are at risk for carrying out unprotected sex.
No matter how you look at it, according to Yahadut (Judaism), there is no aveirah (transgression) in having homosexual or transgendered feelings. What prohibitions are involved in terms of actually carrying out one's desires involves major halachic (Jewish legal) discussions. The GayJews' Homepage goes more into a halachic discussion of homosexuality. You may also want to check out the Open Halacha website.
Remember that you're not alone. There are many gay Jews throughout the world. There is also probably a support group for Jewish queers in your area- especially if you live in a city that is heavily populated by Jews or gays. In the mainstream gay community people tend to come out at an earlier age. Religious Jewish queers generally take a bit longer to come out, so if you are the only person your age in your community meeting, hang in there. More people your age will come eventually. It just takes a bit of patience. Keep up the good work.